15 Decisions That Will Make Your Life Better
What if our reality isn’t dictated by fate? What if, instead, our reality is simply a reflection of all the decisions we’ve made – both big and small?
If you’ve made a decision to create a beautiful life, the kind of life where you are aligned with your purpose, are driven by your vision, and are full of so much passion that you can’t help but be propelled toward prosperity, then there’s one more you have to make:
That you and you alone are fully responsible for your outcomes, realities and fortune.
I’m not going to sugar coat it: this requires a massive amount of ownership of ones thoughts, feelings and actions. It requires that you treat those items as choices – because they are.
What you’ll find on your journey to creating an amazing life is that others who are doing the same are very strategic. They do everything they can to overcome obstacles and mitigate any external threats that thwart the idea of success. You’ll find that those who are just kind of drifting through life are like a leaf in the breeze: whichever way the wind blows is the way that they’re going to go. They aren’t grounded and haven’t yet committed toward a destination, leaving them completely at the mercy of circumstances like politics, economy, mood, emotion, socio-economic background and the well-orchestrated distractions of mass and social media.
There is nothing wrong with drifting, by the way. Unless you want to life in that intersection of purpose and prosperity, driven by vision and passion. If you’ve started on that journey, then it is required of you to cultivate a strategic mindset that lends you the tools you need to pursue your vision, overcome obstacles and not succumb to defeat.
One of those tools is the tool of making powerful decisions. As Tony Robbins says, “Our destinies are determined in our moments of decision.”
To get you started, I’ve put together a list of decisions that I’ve made, and continue to make, that have helped both myself and dozens of clients on their roads to success. I’ve also put together this short video as an introduction to why decisions are so key.
I invite you to decide:
- That you’re worthy of your dream. It might sound strange, but we have deep, unconscious programs running our lives that keep us from truly believing that we deserve to experience joy, freedom, prosperity and creativity. These programs are so well-installed that we sabotage ourselves all the time without even knowing. (Watch a video about one of the most common forms of self-sabotage here.)
- To be the person who wipes down the equipment at the gym. Or puts the grocery cart in the grocery-cart-thingy (technical term) in the parking lot. Or puts your trash in the trash can. Or puts your socks in the hamper.
- To put down your phone. Technology, like money, is an amazing tool and a poor master. If you’re with your friends, at dinner with a loved one, hanging out with a client, creating something amazing, in the room with your child, just put your phone down. It will be there when you’re ready.
- To fill up your gas tank. Fill up the tank in your car to full. Give your unconscious mind the message that you have plenty of resources to get to where you need to go. Fill up your spiritual, physical and psychological gas tank as well. As I write this, I’m in the waiting room of a surgery center with a lot of energy and stimuli (loud television, low vibrations); I feel the drain happening and am planning on filling up my own gas tank with some meditation and a good book.
- To invest in your education. This doesn’t mean university necessarily. Invest in a mastermind, coach, seminar, online program, a book – whatever is calling to you that can expand your skill set and your mind. Don’t have the money? Check again: how much do you spend on entertainment, clothing or coffees that are keeping you in the consumer cycle? YouTube is also an amazing resource.
- To invest in your wellness. Not unlike filling up your gas tank, investing in your wellness can be as simple as giving yourself some “you” time to recharge or getting a detoxifying massage. Download a guided meditation or join a church.
- To start saying “no” to things that you dread. This one takes discipline because it’s programmed so deep in us that we “have” to do certain things. Just this weekend, I had a baby shower because I felt like I had to, but it did not fill me up with a “hell yes” feeling – so I’m still learning. But the next time you’re about to commit to something that drains you instead of adding to that gas tank, just ask why you have to do that thing. (If this is something that is particularly challenging for you, I strongly recommend this book.)
- To say “yes” to things that scare you & fill you with joy. It’s choosing your bliss. I bring up the things that scare you because it’s often the things that scare us and push us out of our comfort zone that open us up to the potential that’s inside of us to create a life that we truly love.
- To stop believing the hype on social media. I took the Facebook app off my phone. Social media is a masterful extension of the distractions that keep us from the highest forms of ourselves. Seriously. If we’re going to start with the (hu)man in the mirror, spending our time scrolling through the lives and opinions of others is another way to keep us from spending some quality time working on ourselves.
- To cut down on television time. This one is for me. When I decide to put off television time and pick up a book instead, I can feel the shift. Television is a lot like social media – designed as a distraction to keep us from our greatest selves. I know for me, I turn to it almost as a numbing agent. If you find yourself doing the same with anything, it might be useful to ask why are you numbing out?
- To forgive. In just a year of coaching, I’ve become all to familiar with the fact that people do atrocious things to others; often the victims are innocent children. It’s heartbreaking. But in just a year of coaching, I’ve also had the honor of bearing witness to victims forgiving their perpetrators and in doing so, releasing themselves from being victims any longer. The forgiveness is not for the perpetrator. It’s for the victim to regain their freedom and their personal power. Once you release yourself from the stance of victim, you regain power.
- To show up. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been *this close* to talking myself out of experiences that have been seminal turning points in my life. I almost rescheduled my first date with the man who would become my husband and is soon to become the father of my child. When I was flying to San Jose for Unleash the Power Within, where some of the most powerful moments of my life happened, I remember staring out the window and thinking: what the hell am I doing? There have been quieter moments: showing up to a networking event that didn’t seem significant at the time only to have someone that I met there call seven months later for coaching or hypnosis. Or connecting with someone that I would later be able to introduce to someone else for a connection that support all parties involved. Also, show up as your best self. Put yourself together. Do your hair. Wear the heels. Be the one who turns heads in a room.
- To take ownership of your circumstances. To say that we haven’t been able to reach our goals or accomplish great things because of where we were born, our upbringing, the government, our spouse, our parents, our children or that ass hole in front of us on the highway this morning that has no idea how to drive is to give away all of our capacities to tap into the potential that we were put on this earth with.
- To start a gratitude journal. Gratitude is the ultimate source of all abundance. It supercedes fear and anger. It helps us understand what we already have is enough and from that place, we can tap into unencumbered creativity, knowing that we’re safe, whole and complete. If my clients are new to this practice, I ask them to free write for three minutes a day either first thing in the morning or before they go to bed about what they’re grateful for. It doesn’t have to be anything profound; if one were to go through my gratitude journals they would come across multiple mentions of being grateful for a gorgeous gown in my closet or the fact that I live in a world with the internet. Nothing is too trivial for this practice.
- To start treating your emotions as a choice. Last, and certainly not least, the decision to master your own emotions is one of the decisions that will yield massive benefits in your life. Think about the way you behave when you wake up in the morning after an amazing night of sleep and you’re just ready to seize the day. You show up with a magnetic energy that communicates to the world that you’re ready to do amazing things. Conversely, think about the way you act when you wake up tired, possibly in a bad mood. Do you smile at the barista on your way to work? What kind of energy do you put into the world? Does it support your greatest good and reflect your highest self? It’s true, negative emotions are often there to reflect something to us that we need to see, but to chronically say that we’re in a “bad mood” as if it’s a fixed reality is another way to give away our personal power.
What are the decisions you can make today that will support you in your bigger vision for your life? Let me know in the comments below and be sure to share this with your networks.
Until next time, shine bright!
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